Brickfilms: Rick and Steve - The Happiest Gay Couple in all the World

Brickfilms rock.

I love this one: Rick & Steve - The Happiest Gay Couple in All the World

Moda - za on i onu. Fashion - for him and her.

Jeans. I wear Seven For All Mankind, bootcut, men's, 31."

I have a pair that is almost only threads. I can't remember why we were in the men's department of Nordstrom. Perhaps because we the store at that entrance. Perhaps because my friend and her husband wanted to shop in that section. Perhaps because I knew I wanted to buy jeans and I recalled that in high school, I wore men's Levi's 501 jeans, and I wondered if men's jeans would again work. I am in graduate school now and jeans are practical and expected, a good pair with some stretch material would make that uniform feminine and flexible - ways to dress it up or down.

I tired on these Seven For All Mankind jeans and asked my friend, "Is this what you felt like when you tried on the perfect wedding dress?"

As my body has changed over the years and as these jeans have stretched out, I have had them altered. Four times. About two years ago, I bought a pair of women's Seven's, and that didn't work. The waist fell in a way that interrupted my line and I found somewhat unflattering. I also felt indiscreet wearing them as they sat low on my hips. I might sell them to the resale shop here. Why did I buy them? I didn't have that "perfect wedding dress" experience in the dressing room. I guess I just thought I should be a female and buy products for women. Perhaps I thought that would make me more like the feminine girl my mom imagines I should be. Finally, time to go back to the men's dept.

I bought my most recent pair early this spring at Nordstrom. I took men's and women's pairs to the dressing room (in the men's dept -more fun) and tried them both on. The salesman told me, just by how his face looks, that the men's jeans were perfect. They looked quite feminine, hit all the right lines. I tried on the women's jeans, to be sure. The salesman said, buy the men's. I did.

What Every Girl Wants

I would like a puppy. A boxer. It would be fawn.

I would name it Rex if it were male and Swateena if it were female.

We would take long walks together on the weekend, but during the week, two short walks daily.

My puppy would sleep on a bed of cedar chips placed inside the house, by the back door.

My puppy and I would be best friends.

Gay Marriage Goes Global

The themes of Knjiga Za Svakog Pedera's recent post, How to Choose a Partner, ideas of what makes a marriage, were picked up by the New York Times Magazine in an article this weekend - click here for a link.

MAGAZINE | April 27, 2008
Young Gay Rites
By BENOIT DENIZET-LEWIS
Why would gay men in their 20s rush to the altar?

Kako ćemo izabrati ženu ili muža (How to choose a wife or husband)

From KZSŽ to KZSP:

Kako ćemo izabrati ženu ili muža (How to choose a wife or husband)

The authors seem to be moving it to the level of practicality and decision making. Science. And a bit...

Does this work also for the pederi who are now interested in long term partnerships? It is quite a bit about what goes on between two people, without considering the conditions in which they live.

A good and lucky choice of a marriage partner is a great happiness. It means finding a person who is more than physically acceptable to us, but also with whom we have shared interests, goals, likes, and tastes. It is impossible to get along with and happily live with someone who has opposite desires, hopes, and wishes than ours (even though we often see such marriages) who has other points of view on life and who finds interests in other areas than we do. It is hard to share life with someone who has no reaction to things that excite us or who is very interested in things that leave us cold. For that type of married pair, it is possible to say they do not speak the same language.

Other than understanding and feelings that bring them together, an important accomplishment in a marriage is its sex life, but even if that is in harmony or even more, if in life together as a married pair there is only that aspect, marriage will leave feelings of disappointment and emptiness. Feelings that unite, dedication, loyalty, and true friendship in the end will, over time, take the place of the hot sex that takes place in the first year of marriage.

Dobro i sretno izabrati bračnog partnera velika je sreća. To znači naći čovjeka koji nas ne samo fizički privlači nego s kojim imamo zajedničke intereste, ciljeve, zajedničke nazore, pa i ukus. Nemoguće je složiti se i sretno živjeti s čovjekom koji imae suprotne žele od naši (iako je u praksi često tako) koji ima drukčije poglede na život i koji nalazi interese na drugim područjima nego mi. Tesko je djeliti zivot s covjekom koji je revnodusan prema onome sto nas uzbudjuje ili se strasno zanima za ono sto nas ostavilja hladnim. Za takav bracni par moze se reci da ne govore istim jezikom.

Osim razumijevanja i osjećajne povezanosti, važan činilac u braku je i seksualan život, ali ma kako bio skladan, on nije vječan, i ako u zajedničkom životu postoji samo ta komponenta u životu bračnih drugova, nastat će razočaranje i praznina. Osjećaj povezanosti, odanosti i pravog prijateljstva u kasnijim ce godinama zamijeniti seksualni zanos prvih godina braka.

Happy Passover!

Translation

Peder has a connotation in Croatian, stronger than just saying gay man.

Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia and this blog

This morning's FT (page 12) has an interview with the Chief Executive of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia, Susan Lyne. Ms. Lyne talks about men and the domestic space. About 20% of Martha Stewart's audience is men. Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia is interested in ideas about programming for this audience.

I think the book, Knjiga Za Svakog Pedera, is what they are looking for!

Gay Man, Fashion, and Sport

Here is a start to the chapter titled, "Peder, Moda i Sport," again, taken from KZSZ
Gay man and Fashion (Peder i Moda)
Fashion and Dressing (Moda i odijevanje)
A Few Secrets for a Good Figure (Male tanje dobre linije) If you have wide hips or narrow shoulders, how to pick fabrics and cuts that will flatter
SEWING (KROJENJE)
How to take measurements (Kako se uzima mjera?)

Table of Contents (Sadržaj)

Here is the table of contents for the chapters of Knjiga Za Svakog Pedera, taken from Knijga Za Svaku Ženu. In parenthesis is the Croatian, the chapter title in Knijga Za Svaku Ženu and then the adaptation for Knjiga Za Svakog Pedera.

Table of Contents (Sadržaj)

Gay man and the home (Žena i Dom ... Peder i Dom)

Gay man taking care of his house (Žena Domaćica ... Peder Domać)

Gay man as Father (Žena Majka ... Peder Otac)

Gay man and health (Žena i Zdravlje ... Peder i Zdravlje)

Gay man and manners (Žena i Odgojitelj ... Peder Odgojitelj)

Gay man, fashion, and sport (Žena, Moda i Sport ... Peder, Moda i Sport)

Gay man and his rights (Žena i Njena Prava ... Peder i Njevoga Prava)

Gay Table Settings

I am thinking of the correct way for gay men in Central Europe to set the table.
I think textiles are required. Tablecloth or place mats and, of course, always cloth napkins. With monogram, one letter, the first letter of the last name, or the first letter of the first name, to be humorous.

White tablecloth. Place mats can be colored.

Porcelain. Everyday and special occasion.

For special occasion, Herend is too gay. Its symbolism is Hungarian aristocracy and matriarchs. Matriarchs and gay men work together. I will have to think about how Hungarian aristocracy works with eroticism. I think, though, there is a clear connection between Austria and eroticism.

I know that Rosenthal and Meissen and Villeroy & Boch are not Austrian, but I still think they could work, especially Rosenthal. Villeroy & Boch is too mainstream bourgeoisie as in a wedding gift. Meissen is exquisite and for the serious collector. It is so bourgeoisie Central Europe that it is beyond bourgeoisie Central Europe and symbolizes the best of the place and people, like secessionist architecture. Rosenthal has a cool edge. It can be very plain or slightly decorative.

Rosenthal has some Versace designs, and that is very cool for Central European men. It says, I am not over the top gay and flamboyant, I have taste, and I like nice things. I like to reinterpret traditions.

Croatian (Bosnian) Cavalier

Tarik Filipović is one of my favorite public male personalities in Zagreb's world of arts and sports. I always know that I am in a familiar place when I pass him walking on Ilica or when I am sitting at Pif and see him walking by.
You might see him this way, with his wife Lejla...

Sex Roles and Football (nogomet)

Can a soccer coach of a national team set the tone for male sexuality in Central Eastern Europe?
Slaven Bilic has been described as the best representative of Croatia in Europe. He is the kind of man that can coach a soccer team, love and discipline his players, and act civilized.

Slavic Homosocial Relationships (male friendship in Eastern Europe)

Analysis of the Bush-Sanader/Mesic and Bush-Putin meetings should be conducted from a perspective of male love, homosociality, in Eastern Europe.
Check out this analysis of the Bush-Putin Friendship:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7333399.stm

Hand holding between Bush and Sanader ... I like it ...


What is your reaction to this photo?


What about this one?

Would these photos look the same or give you the same reaction if they were between, say, Bush and another American male?
They show genuine fondness and sentimentality.
Maybe that is good.

Shower Caps

I wonder if gay men wear shower caps. Do they install removable shower heads? What are their routines for home hygiene?

Today I took a shower with my shower cap. My hair / scalp isn't dirty every day, usually every other day works, and if I blow out my hair, I can even go three days. I shower as I need. Sometimes, for example in summer, I might shower daily, or even twice a day. In winter, I might limit my exposure to skin drying hot water and just use lukewarm water in areas that should be cleaned daily (yes, that is what I mean). That is why I installed a removable shower head, so I can reach places without soaking my whole body, and so I can wash my hair without having to take a shower (I also use a shower cap so I don't get splash on my hair and walk out of the house with wet hair in 32 f weather). I also swim frequently year-round, so much of my hair-washing and bathing happens at the shower at the pool facility.

Writing at the Home Office

Writing at the home office for a few days, I find that I think impure thoughts.

Consult with Scientist

I have started the scientific research for my book, "Knjiga za Svakog Pedera." I interviewed on Sunday night a scientific expert on gay men, who has research experience with homosexual pornography from Prague (BelAmi) as well as the history of sexuality across the globe.

We talked about the power dynamics of tops and bottoms. More later...

Knjiga za Svakog Pedera

knjigazasvakogpedera.blogspot.com is the website for the "Knjiga za Svakog Pedera" book project. It is a scientific guide to life in contemporary, urban Croatia. It applies current scientific research on daily life and larger questions, from how to do the laundry so colors don't fade to how to live in harmony with a man. "Knjiga za Svakog Pedera" takes its inspiration from the book "Knjiga za Svaku Zenu."

We will be posting our ideas here and invite your contributions.

(this is not anti-peder/anti-gay, it is maybe like a post communist, Central European "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.")